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Growing up, I never wanted children. They seemed to be a lot of responsibility and would make me lose all of my free time. However, after having kids, I found myself having more drive and determination than ever.
My goal was to provide the absolute best life ever for my children. I had things all planned out in my head: make millions and open accounts for them at young ages so that by the time they turned 18, they would be millionaires without lifting a finger. I think we can agree that most adults fantasize about this type of life for their children. And most of us spend each day working extremely hard to provide it.
Recently, I had the privilege of meeting a new friend named Abdul. He is from Pakistan and had transitioned to Dubai, leaving his family in the attempt of creating a better life for them back home. He has been in Dubai for a year now and sends his earnings back to Pakistan to support his family. I thought to myself, "Wow, what commitment. He's missing out on precious moments, looking at the potential life he's creating for his family in the future."
Abdul told me this is very common for people in Pakistan. Because the economy is very bad there, they must move to another country to be able to provide for their families back home. I can relate, myself: pursuing professional sports, willing to go months without seeing my children or wife in order to potentially retire them forever.
I don't think anyone would disagree with this logic. However, the sad reality is that those material possessions that we work so hard to give our children actually take them further away from God.
"24 But woe to (alas for) you who are rich (abounding in material resources), for you already are receiving your consolation (the solace and sense of strengthening and cheer that come from prosperity) and have taken and enjoyed your comfort in full [having nothing left to be awarded you]." - Luke 6:24 AMPC
Before truly devoting my life to God, I had every intention of devoting my life to my children. I discovered, however, that the stress of creating the best future for our children actually ends up creating bad parents.
I think most people would justify themselves as being good parents by comparing themselves to either their own or those they have seen on reality tv shows. However, Jesus says that even our best fathers in this world are evil compared to God.
"11 If you then, evil as you are, know how to give good and advantageous gifts to your children, how much more will your Father Who is in heaven [perfect as He is] give good and advantageous things to those who keep on asking Him!" - Matthew 7:11 AMPC
We are so quick to teach our children how to walk, but don't put much effort into teaching them the direction in which to walk in. The reality is that Jesus Himself says that only a few people will go to Heaven. Therefore, one could make the argument that out of every father that has ever walked the earth, there have only been a few good ones.
In order to see if we are truly great fathers, we must compare ourselves to who the Bible says is a good father. Under the new covenant, we are accepted by God through our faith in his Son, Jesus Christ. By accepting Jesus and following God's guidance, we become sons and daughters of Abraham. Abraham is known as the Father of Faith. There are many fathers in the world today, but the Bible says that a father like Abraham is one that is accepted by God.
"29 And if you belong to Christ [are in Him Who is Abraham’s Seed], then you are Abraham’s offspring and [spiritual] heirs according to promise." - Galatians 3:29 AMPC
The interesting thing in society is that fathers go to work relying on their own personal grit and dedication to leave an inheritance for their children. When it comes to the Kingdom of God, however, faith is the currency. Faith is what makes a man, and a lack of faith is what destroys him. Abraham was justified by God because he trusted in Him and had the faith to leave everything familiar in pursuit of Him.
"8 [Urged on] by faith Abraham, when he was called, obeyed and went forth to a place which he was destined to receive as an inheritance; and he went, although he did not know or trouble his mind about where he was to go. 9 [Prompted] by faith he dwelt as a temporary resident in the land which was designated in the promise [of God, though he was like a stranger] in a strange country, living in tents with Isaac and Jacob, fellow heirs with him of the same promise. 10 For he was [waiting expectantly and confidently] looking forward to the city which has fixed and firm foundations, whose Architect and Builder is God." - Hebrews 11:8-10 AMPC
By God's standard, a good father is one that walks with God and teaches his children to do the same. A good father in God's opinion is one that teaches his children not to put so much focus on building a life on this earth, but rather successfully inheriting a better life in the world to come. One that teaches his children to forsake their comforts in order to be accepted by the Comforter.
"16 But the truth is that they were yearning for and aspiring to a better and more desirable country, that is, a heavenly [one]. For that reason God is not ashamed to be called their God [even to be surnamed their God—the God of Abraham, Isaac, and Jacob], for He has prepared a city for them." - Hebrews 11:16 AMPC
Imagine that. A father telling his kids not to worry about anything this world has to offer, to forget about all the things this world has and focus on Someone greater, who created all of what we can see. We would say that is a bad father. But how can we, being evil, say what is good and what is bad? It seems as though God's opinion of a great father and ours doesn't typically align. Would we dare say that He is mistaken?
Abraham was willing to sacrifice his son because of his trust in God. We have to imagine the type of commitment Abraham's son saw from his father growing up. This is the standard that has been set for all of us.
"7 Know and understand that it is [really] the people [who live] by faith who are [the true] sons of Abraham." - Galatians 3:7 AMPC
Choosing a specific career path will get you accepted and praised by the people of this world, but choosing to abandon this life and sometimes even the people in it will get you accepted by God. The father of faith, Abraham, left his children an example of what it means to live for God. This is what got him accepted by God and granted him permission to be labeled as the father of all.
1 When Abram was ninety-nine years old, the Lord appeared to him and said, I am the Almighty God; walk and live habitually before Me and be perfect (blameless, wholehearted, complete). 2 And I will make My covenant (solemn pledge) between Me and you and will multiply you exceedingly. 3 Then Abram fell on his face, and God said to him, 4 As for Me, behold, My covenant (solemn pledge) is with you, and you shall be the father of many nations. 5 Nor shall your name any longer be Abram [high, exalted father]; but your name shall be Abraham [father of a multitude], for I have made you the father of many nations." - Genesis 17:1-5 AMPC
Out of billions of fathers, almost every one of them has had the opportunity to teach their kids how to walk. But the only fathers that are worth mentioning in God's book are the ones that taught their children how to walk with God.
"11 Now faith is the assurance (the confirmation, the title deed) of the things [we] hope for, being the proof of things [we] do not see and the conviction of their reality [faith perceiving as real fact what is not revealed to the senses]. 2 For by [faith—trust and holy fervor born of faith] the men of old had divine testimony borne to them and obtained a good report. 3 By faith we understand that the worlds [during the successive ages] were framed (fashioned, put in order, and equipped for their intended purpose) by the word of God, so that what we see was not made out of things which are visible.4 [Prompted, actuated] by faith Abel brought God a better and more acceptable sacrifice than Cain, because of which it was testified of him that he was righteous [that he was upright and in right standing with God], and God bore witness by accepting and acknowledging his gifts. And though he died, yet [through the incident] he is still speaking. 5 Because of faith Enoch was caught up and transferred to heaven, so that he did not have a glimpse of death; and he was not found, because God had translated him. For even before he was taken to heaven, he received testimony [still on record] that he had pleased and been satisfactory to God. 6 But without faith it is impossible to please and be satisfactory to Him. For whoever would come near to God must [necessarily] believe that God exists and that He is the rewarder of those who earnestly and diligently seek Him [out]." - Hebrews 11:1-6 AMPC
In order to truly be great fathers, we must go back to the drawing board and see who and what makes a man a great father in the eyes of God. Abraham, known as one of the greatest fathers of all, left his comforts and familiarity behind and traveled and trusted God. Once he received a son from God, he then offered his son back to God. He trusted in God's plan and who God is rather than relying on his own wisdom and understanding.
By this, he taught us, his children, that the only way that we can be a good father is by respecting and fully devoting our lives to the greatest Father of all time, God. There are millions of people happy to call Abraham their father, not because of his material possesions left to be inherited, but because of what he left behind that can never be replaced or broken: his faith.
Question of the Day: Considering Faith is the currency of the Kingdom of God, would God consider you a deadbeat father based on the amount of faith you have left behind for your children?